By Lorraine Grubbs
I got to the Starbucks early for my coaching appointment with the newly appointed Chief Pilot of an aviation company. The CEO of a small (30 employee) private charter company had contacted me and told me that she had promoted a line captain who had been with the company for two years and had, on numerous occasions, demonstrated leadership skills, to Chief Pilot. She realized he was not a seasoned leader, so she asked me to help him learn the basics of leadership. She said that she was simply too busy to coach him given the frantic nature of their 24/7 business and, since I had been in the aviation business, felt I could relate to this particular leadership situation. The company had recently undergone some major growth, which meant the addition of a number of new pilots and she needed a strong, capable leader to bring the new team together.
At 9 a.m. straight up, John strutted in, projecting the aura of a confident, poised leader. I called his name and he approached the table, put out his hand and we shook, introducing ourselves. “John”, I said, “It’s nice to meet you.” “Likewise”, he said, as he took the seat across the table from me. And, we began to talk. Or, I should say, HE began to talk, and talk, and talk. As he talked, his attention was consistently drawn to any attractive woman that walked in. As he spoke, he started all his sentences with “I”. “When I did this…when I said this…” I would occasionally interject, but he would interrupt me each time to continue with his conversation. Finally, after about 30 minutes he ran out of steam and looked at me and asked, “Well, what do you think?”
I did not hesitate. “I really don’t care”, I stated. He was shocked to hear me say that but I went on to explain. “John, I am here to assess your potential to become the Chief Pilot in terms of your ability to lead a team. You walked in, introduced yourself and started telling me what you needed to do. You did not bring anything to take notes with and almost every sentence contained some version of the word “I”…” I think this needs to be done…I have this idea…” Instead of first seeking to understand why we were there, you sat down and started talking about yourself. The entire time you talked, your attention was continually drawn to any attractive girl that walked in, clearly taking your attention away from our conversation”.
He looked at me with a surprised expression as I continued. “I have been hired by your boss to assess your potential as a leader. And, quite frankly, I am not impressed. You have a very large ego. I understand that you probably developed that ego because in order to get hired as a pilot you had to compete against others for limited positions and further, each time you get in the cockpit you are taking people’s lives in your hands, therefore you have to be supremely confident in what you do. But, John, you are no longer a line pilot. You must now begin to think of yourself as a Chief Pilot, a leader of other pilots. And, it is important for you to start thinking about how to get your ego under control. Have you ever heard the adage; People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care? Well, in my experience that is a true statement. If you are going to gain the trust of your team, you must first start by getting to know them and not worrying so much about how others see you”.
He did not expect to hear that. He sat back, and said “Wow, that bad, huh? I guess I have some work to do. Can we start again? “. “Sure”, I said, and, we did. At the conclusion of the session I gave John an assignment: to take the Myers-Briggs personality assessment and email me the results. We agreed that we would talk about the results in our next meeting. As John stood up to leave, (my notepaper in hand), he thanked me, told me he was looking forward to our next session, and walked out, a more humbled man. And, I knew that our work would be challenging…he would need to learn how to differentiate between arrogance and confidence.
Stay tuned for next month’s article and John’s continuing journey in “Ego and Leadership”.
Lorraine Grubbs is the president of Lessons in Loyalty. You can contact Lorraine at 281-813-0305 or by email at [email protected]
www.lessonsinloyalty.com
